Life? Where are you?

Weight: 148 (yesterday at 9 AM)

I've been lazy. Like really really lazy. I've stopped going for my 30 minute power walks at lunch. I've stopped walking for 30 minutes after work. I've eaten take out sushi 4 days in a row now and ate an entire row of rainbow chip cookies last night. Even now my boyfriend is washing the dishes I created while he was away because I'm to lazy to deal with them.

My doctor thinks I'm a little depressed. I'm showing what she says are the most common warning signs: sleeping more then 10 hours a night and still being tired, not washing nearly as often as normal, caring little about ones appearance, fear of leaving the house and well you get the picture. She offered me mediation and I think I snapped a nasty comment at her.

Do I feel depressed? No not really. I sure feel detached, but that's not the same thing. I've officially been accepted to college, and given my tuition deposit, meaning I'll be quitting my job of 4 years in August. Steve and I are working on being a more functional couple and I just sold my money pit of a car (aka Josephine the 2001 Light Green Beetle)

All of these changes have left me feeling like I am watching my life from the outside, almost like I have no power over whats going on. I also find that I don't really care. I don't care that the house is getting filthy, that I'm slightly out of touch with reality, that my laundry pile of clean and dirty now have caves that my cats are borrowing in.

So my gentle readers, when I went to my WW meeting and the lady asked me why there had been little change in my weight in the last month and a bit, I almost told her to *uck off. Terrible. I just mumbled that I didn't know. I do know, and I'm glad I told you all instead. I already feel better :)